I once heard that you should only keep the friends that will help you move. As I've gotten older and have less time and energy to keep up with everyone, I tend to apply this concept. For me moving is a tedious, painful, arduous, and overwhelming task. I really don't know anyone who enjoys it. Sure there is the reward of moving to a new home / city / country / continent but first you must stare at the pile of things you've amassed over the many many years and wonder why at one point you thought it was a good idea to buy a faux leopard-skinned bean bag (not that I've ever owned one, really). Not only do you need good friends who will help pack and carry the boxes, but you need friends who care enough to tell you that you should really let go of said beanbag.
This idea came to mind because I've recently been back in touch with my good friend "Larry". We met in London but now he lives far away in a place that I couldn't point out on a map. I'm American after all and Larry would never begrudge me for my poor sense of geography. My world has been a bit topsy turvy lately (for a variety of reasons I won't into detail) and out of nowhere Larry came back on the scene as if he was channeling my frustrations.
Larry and I once had a major falling out that took us a long time and a lot of work to repair. It had something to do with the fact that I am quite transparent about my feelings and my emotions tend to lay on the surface while Larry completely tends towards conflict avoidance and emotional detachment. It was a tough time for us but afterward Larry told me he was grateful that we'd made it through and was actually very appreciative for what he had learned through the experience. I guess it's not so strange that the student has become the master and Larry is using my own words on me now.
And Larry really has helped me move. I asked Larry to have dinner with me one evening. When he arrived I mentioned there were a few large pieces of furniture I needed to move before I left for San Francisco. Ever the gentleman Larry started dragging bookshelves and tables down the street and climbing over walls and into windows to get everything moved out. Beware if you get a dinner invitation from me ;-)
Although things are a bit scary, overwhelming, and the future is unclear I am grateful for these friends that are part of my global "urban family". Yes, a bit mushier than my usual posts but I just felt like writing.
I've helped you move! :) And, I was surprised to see that I've completed a (mere) few things on your bucket list that you have yet to complete. My life has been quite sedated compared to yours in recent years ;)
Posted by: nujenn | January 20, 2011 at 01:42 AM
*sedentary, not sedated
p.s. You kick my a** in gastronomical adventures! Who envies who now?!
Posted by: nujenn | January 20, 2011 at 02:00 AM
@nujenn: You indeed have helped me move which is why I still drag myself down to the south bay to see you ;-) I have no idea how you could think your life has been sedentary over the last few years. You've accomplished so much with your beautiful family than I could imagine.
Posted by: teavu | January 20, 2011 at 09:16 AM